An I’m Struggling Weigh In
Every time I think I have it, something happens that proves to me I do not. It’s always time to reevaulate, and that is what I’m doing this week.
Yesterday, I posted this picture and said that this represents my weight loss journey this week.
Why is that?
Because as I see that photo, the person is struggling. Yes, they are trying to reach a mighty goal, and they might succeed…
…but at the moment, they are dangling off of a rock. In my mind, they are closer to utterly falling to failure than making it to success.
Am I being too bitter and pessimistic?
Yeah, probably. I need to get it out of my system for a minute. Don’t worry; as soon as I post my weigh-in results for this week, I’ll let you know my game plan.
February 18, 2011
Last Week’s Weight: 356.6
Today’s Weight: 359.0
Change from All-Time High: -43.8 pounds
Change from Last Week: +2.4 pounds
I’ve been counting my points. Weight Watchers emphasizes making healthy choices.
I’ve only been counting my points. I have not been making healthy choices. That is the ONLY thing that I can see I am doing wrong here, so therefore, that is what I must change.
Some people say that a calorie is a calorie.
I call crap on that statement. When I was in my mid-twenties, it did work that way. As I am getting older, my metabolism changes. If you can lose weight eating fast food several times a week and just keeping your calories under control, then good for you. You have the benefit of youth and a faster metabolism than most on your side. For those of us in our thirties, it just doesn’t work that way anymore. We have to watch our calories AND be mindful of what we fuel our bodies with.
Experience on MULTIPLE occasions has shown that, for me, this is not the case. I can keep my calories (or points – same diff) under tight control, but if I have made poor food choices, I will not lose weight.
Craig recently posted a NINE pound weight loss, and he did it by watching what he ate and cleaning up his diet.
So, how have I been eating?
I have a little confession to make. I’m a Mystery Shopper. Usually two or three times a week, I go to a fast food restaurant, order a certain meal, time how long it takes for the food to come to me, eat said meal to evaluate the food, and then go home, report my results, and I get reimbursed for my meal and usually an extra $5 to $30. It has been decent money for doing something that is pretty easy.
And it’s wreaking havoc on my health.
Don’t get me wrong – I don’t pretend that these calories don’t count. I have been counting every single bite that goes in my mouth, and I am not overeating otherwise.
I’m finding that if I eat three or four fast food hamburgers a week, even counting those calories, I can’t lose weight.
A friend recommend that I try eating very healthy and clean, just to give me more energy to train for the Run For Your Lives 5K in October. What do I have to lose?
I’m putting Mystery Shopping on the back burner for a while. Yes, that extra $200 a month or so is amazingly good money for a job that doesn’t even really take much time, but my health is worth far more to me than $200 a month. I’ll try and find another way to make some extra income to help pay the bills. Anyone need a copywriter? My wife knits – want to buy a baby blanket?
But seriously, money isn’t everything. Tina and I talked about this last night. What good is it making an extra $200 a month to help pay down some credit card debt if I’m going to die in my forties because I can’t get my obesity under control?
I know that I won’t eat clean for every meal for the rest of my life. It isn’t possible. Holidays and parties will come up. I’ll feel the urge to have a Papa Johns Pizza sometimes.
I’m going to shoot for 90% healthy and 10% whatever. Somedays will be 100% healthy. I’m going to try and use the next week for a cleanse as much as possible, so I’m hoping to be 100% for the next week.
There are TONS of great meals we can make that are going to be 100% clean and healthy for us. I don’t even have to give up homemade pizza. Tina is making a crust tonight out of whole wheat flour. I just have to limit my indulgences and always go for the healthier option.
This is my body. My vehicle. I have to give it the best fuel I possibly can. Why should I cram a fast food hamburger down my gullet when I can create a similar food masterpiece at home that might even taste better that will be better for me in all possible ways?
Let me return to my photo. I’ve been struggling. I don’t deny that. I don’t apologize for it, and I’m not saying this for sympathy. Every weight loss blogger I’ve ever known who has had any degree of success as has struggled to some degree or another. I’m certainly no different.
So yes, that rock climber is struggling. How else does that photo match my experience?
He has equipment to help him succeed. I have Weight Watchers, I have people reading my blog who offer tons of support (seriously – I love you people!), I have family and friends who want to see me do well, and I currently have a kitchen stocked full of healthy, clean, nourishing foods.
He clearly isn’t climbing alone, or there wouldn’t have been anyone to take the picture. I’ve got the aforementioned people, and I’m certainly not the only fat person in the world struggling to lose weight.
He has a beautiful destination ahead of him, and he’s going to reach it soon.
So am I.
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4 Responses to “An I’m Struggling Weigh In”
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Hey there Jeremy. I can really feel your frustration in this post. Damn, I’ve been there. I’m there sometimes once a week… sometimes I’m there every single stinking day… sometimes it seems like it won’t get better. But it does. And your post is so positive, in spite of how frustrated you’ve been.
The community really helps, and so does your honesty with everybody (and yourself!) I’m proud of you for not doing the mystery shopper thing. You’ve made a big step and put your health ahead of money, which is so hard to do.
Training for a 5K would be awesome. They are so much fun too! Keep us posted on how that goes.
Take care man.
Lynne Garcia recently posted..BOOYAH- Non-Scale Victory!!!!
The first thing that sprang to mind when I read this was the phrase “water weight.” Restaurant food as a rule is incredibly high in sodium (even when you cant taste the salt).
Congrats though on sticking with it, even during the hard weeks.
Mama Kelly aka Jia recently posted..What’s Cooking – Indian Thai Egyptian Food and Vegan Cupcakes
Way to stay positive Jer…I like your outlook on things. Do you weigh everyday? I don’t, but when i have bad weeks I always wonder “what if I’m just having a heavy day and I really lost all the other ones?” lol. You’d be amazed at the excuses I come up with.
I had a great # this week but remember what I said in my post: this was almost like a week one weigh in for me, as my body was kind of shocked back into a strict lower calorie eating plan with exercise and lots of water, instead of no exercise, tons of junk, and vodka!
Oh also, you know I don’t eat fruits and most veggies, so I really struggle with a “clean” diet….so I really have to heavily focus on the calorie counting thing and hope that the “calorie is a calorie” aspect will work for me in some form. I wish I could do salads, but I digress
Keep going–are you doing your measurements? I started mine on Sunday for weeks when the scale isn’t moving. I’m gonna measure twice a month I think. We shall see.
Craig recently posted..A “Biggest Loser” ish workout!
We don’t only eat for calories, we eat for nutrients. Dr. Fuhrman has this really good formula:
Health = Nutrients / Calories
And by nutrients he means micro-nutrients – the vitamins, minerals, sterols and flavenoids that our bodies crave. So for health and weight loss, the best food to eat are the ones that have the most nutrients per calorie, i.e. fruit and vegetables. Foods like grains and cereals have relatively low nutrients per calorie and therefore they don’t nourish us. The body can only release weight when it is nourished.
Good for you for being so open about your struggles. I think you’re on the right path.
Hanlie recently posted..Look inside you and be strong